Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Blue Valentine and Roissy's Maxims

Guys,

Commenter Surfed over at CR has compiled a list of Roissy's maxims. Good stuff. And hilarious. And I can't wait to see the movie Blue Valentine.




The Maxims:

Maxim #1a: Women desire men of better quality than themselves.

Maxim #2: Women are turned on by displays of male power.

Maxim #3: Whenever an attractive girl tells you she hates assholes, or describes her experience in the past dating assholes and claims to avoid them now, or recites a laundry list of asshole-y things guys do that she disapproves of, you can bet your weight in gold bricks that she wants you to be an asshole to her.

Maxim #4: Never trust a woman who is missing a sense of humor.

Maxim #6: Never. Make. It. Easy. For. A. Woman.

Maxim #7: Your girl will thank you for your steadfast devotion to your belief in yourself.

Maxim #8: Always assume she is a slut. It helps kick the legs out from under the pedestal you will be tempted to put her on, and it is more often than not true.

Maxim #9: The greater the age difference between the older man and the younger woman, the tighter his game will need to be, barring compensatory attributes (money).

Maxim #10: Marriage is a social mechanism designed to exchange sex for indentured servitude.

Maxim #11: Calling a girl out on her lie accomplishes nothing.

Maxim #12: When the love is gone, women can be as cold as if they had never known you.

Maxim #13: When in doubt, game.

Maxim #14: Female cultural equality = male dating inequality. Female cultural inequality = male dating equality. Human nature says that you can‘t have it both ways.

Maxim #15: Be narcissistic. There is no greater divergence than that between a woman’s stated disapproval of male narcissism and the rapidity with which she jumps into bed with a male narcissist.

Maxim #16: The two fundamental propositions are male choosiness and female abundance. All alpha males have these two mindsets in common. Corollary: Male choosiness and female abundance do not necessarily have to be true for the strategy of behaving as if they are true to be effective at seduction.

Maxim #17: The alpha male thinks and acts more like a woman than a man in matters of seduction. He understands his adversary’s psychology, and uses it to allay her defenses.

Maxim #18: Never talk about getting into a relationship even if she says that’s what she’s looking for.

Maxim #19: Withholding sex is the tactic of a woman who has already lost. It is mutually assured destruction.

Maxim #20: If a woman says the word “sex” in conversation with you or about you, no matter the context, it means she’s thinking about having sex with you.

Maxim #21: Women are more pliable in the company of competing women.

Maxim #22: You have to make marriage an attractive alternative for MEN — not women — if you want the institution to thrive.

Maxim #23: The vagina tingle is the principal moral code to which women subscribe. All other moral considerations are secondary.

Maxim #24: When in doubt, ask yourself “WWJD?” What Would a Jerk Do? Then do that.

Maxim #25: NO girl wants to be thought she isn’t a special little snowflake.

Maxim #26: Never tell a girl how much you make, even if you’re loaded. In case of marriage, keep separate accounts.

Maxim #27: If you want a wife, stay clear of investing much in girls who constantly remind you they like to have “fun, fun, fun” and “get bored easily”.

Maxim #28: The more experience you have with women, the more you’ll know which women have experience with men: It is the inexperienced beta male who is most often in the dark about a woman’s sexual history and liable to be victimized by it.

Maxim #29: Xenophobia is good for diversity.

Maxim #30: Women will not hold it against you for trying to get into their panties on the first night. In fact, they will respect you more for your boldness and willingness to follow your manly desires.

Maxim #31: If you plan on cheating and subsequently get caught, act like a total dick who did nothing wrong. Your girlfriend will then wonder if it’s something she did.

Maxim #32: Commanding women to do your bidding will give you a bigger beta margin of error when needed.

Maxim #33: Women need to test men for their grace under pressure.

Maxim #34: If she’s hot, why would she bother with online dating?

Maxim #35: Never trust a woman’s advice on how to please women. Her advice is designed for alpha men she already finds attractive and from whom she seeks signals of attainability and commitment.

Maxim #36: A woman’s sex and relationship advice isn’t meant to help men; it’s meant to distract men from what really works to attract women.

Maxim #37: High IQ is no inoculation against beta delusion. If anything, high IQ obstructs clear thinking about women’s nature.

Maxim #38: The longer you are away from seducing new women, the harder it will be to seduce one when you want.

Maxim #39: The worst thing to happen to women in America was women’s suffrage.

Maxim #40: Men are becoming ever bigger betas in their dealings with women. Men are losing the leverage to shape and push women’s child-like and selfishly amoral political opinions in logical, just and long-term oriented directions.

Maxim #41: The definition of Inner Game: Hit on every woman who excites you. Make life uncomfortable for them, not yourself.

Maxim # 42: When a girl signals that she doesn’t enjoy blowjobs or sex, do not spend one second more with her. Your libido is too important to gamble on such a girl.

Maxim #43: In their sexual primes women’s attraction for assholes is at its strongest. You can catch a lot of hungry flies with honey, but shit attracts the most well-fed flies.

Maxim #44: If you get sexually rejected, don’t admit it to yourself, and especially don’t admit it to the girl.

Maxim #45: Women will screech louder the closer your words get to damaging or exposing vulnerabilities in their sexual market value.

Maxim #46: Whenever you hear or read the words “gender”, “gendered”, “gendered norm”, “subtle gender bias”, or “increasingly egalitarian, yet there remains…” know that you are dealing with a leftwing moonbat, blank-slate believing fruitcake who cannot deal with the fact that men and women are biologically different from birth.

Maxim #47: Awareness of a woman’s games is a precision-guided weapon in a man’s arsenal of seduction.

Maxim #48: Respect the momentum.

Maxim #49: The rare older woman-younger man pairing is like a lab experiment gone wrong. It violates the natural order of things, and leaves its practitioners emotionally twisted and in a constant mental race to hyper-rationalize their sub-par mate choice.

Maxim #50: Marriage is no escape from the sexual market and the possibility that you may be outbid by a competitor with higher value.

Maxim #51: For most women, five minutes of alpha is worth five years of beta.

Maxim #52: Underneath the veneer of civilized discourse we act in ways that are brazenly self-interested in the short term.

Maxim #53: All kneel before the god of biomechanics, by sword or by surrender.

Maxim #54: When a woman has incentive to lie, she will choose lying over honesty EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Maxim #55: Run for your Life Shit Tests:
BEWARE the classic gun-to-the-head marriage pressure administered by your typical non-descript, rudderless late 20’s/early 30’s woman.
When a woman pressures you mercilessly to marry her, bullying to the point of threatening a break up – this is the shit test of ALL shit tests. Treat it as such – If you fail this shit test, you are RUINED. FOR. LIFE.

Maxim #60: Waving a roll of benjamins at a woman will not give her tingles. In fact, it will often do the opposite.

Maxim #73: When a girl emphatically insists she is so over you, she’s never been more into you.

Maxim #21: Betas pay, alphas split, super alphas profit.

Maxim #39: A woman’s standards are like a house of cards: kick out one from the bottom and the whole edifice crashes down.

Maxim #85: As women’s bodies age and weaken, their rationalization hamsters grow bigger and stronger. Eventually, the hamster is powerful enough to take control of all higher order consciousness.

Maxim #87: The more expensive or thoughtful the gift you give a girl, the greater the risk that she will subconsciously begin to think she is too good for you.

Corollary to Maxim #87: If you are dating out of your league, or you are dating a young hot babe in her prime, you should do the exact opposite of what everyone will tell you to do — *don’t* buy her expensive gifts. Be particularly wary of advice from women. No woman in the world is capable of thinking clearly or impartially on the matter of “acceptable” levels of male provisioning. Even old, fat hausfrau hogs will expect mountains of jewels in offerings from men.

Maxim #105: Where there’s incentive, there are lies.

Maxim #109: Consensual polyamory is a contrived hookup service for undesirable sexual market rejects.

Maxim #198: Use of the word “disenfranchised” or other similar nomenclature of deconstructivist post-modern pablum automatically discredits an argument for serious consideration.

Maxim #200: Chicks dig guys willing to risk an early, gruesome death. Expendability is a DHV.

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