Thursday, January 27, 2011

My take on OKCupid's latest

I love the statistical work at OKCupid. Lotta folks seem to be commenting on their latest post, including Her HUSness. Since this blog needs some content, I'll give it a go. Instead of putting a lot of thought into the merits of OKCupids findings and drearily double-checking the statistics, I'm going to offer comments on the photos of the girls:

Girl 1 and Girl 2 are ranked similarly in appearance, but Girl 1 gets more messages than Girl 2. This is Girl 1:

This is Girl 2:

This is surprising to me. Girl 1 is pretty in a hipster/goth/emo kinda way, but she seems like she'd have a lot of drama. Not Mrs. ADC material. Pass.

Girl 2 is beautiful. She's an easily overlooked type, but she's a good example of how jaw-droppingly beautiful an ordinary girl can be. I like her smile. She seems sweet. Her jewelry is understated and tasteful. The pony tail is cute. The one thing that's odd about this picture is what she's wearing. Is she a cross-country runner or something? If so, her athleticism speaks well of her and it's also a sneaky way for a prudey girl to post a picture with some skin. Thumbs up.

Next up is these two. Girl 3:

and Girl 4:

Not crazy about either one of these girls. Girl 3 does better than 4, but that doesn't surprise me because there's something about Girl 4's pose that I don't like. Maybe it's the almost kissy face that belongs at Girl 3 looks right into the camera. I like that.

Girl 5 is here:

Girl 5 does better than Girl 6, who is here:

Girl 5 has a cute expression, but I'd go with Girl 6 because I like the gingers. She also has amazing blue eyes. It's not really something I look for, but it is notable when you see it.

Now, for the two girls featured at Hooking Up Smart:

Girl 7:

and Girl 8:

Girl 7 is clearly a train wreck. This girl has suffered in the past, and if you wind up with her, you'll suffer in the future.

Girl 8 is very attractive. You can see she is beautiful and happy, and the twinkle in her eyes conveys confidence, vivacious, and if you're lucky, mischief. She might even be smart and funny to boot. So, she might be the total package, the girl of your dreams. Or she could be a total bitch. It all depends on how gracious she is. It doesn't depend on how receptive she is a man's advances. She could still be amazing and not attracted to a guy. Likewise, she could be horrid gargoyle and still be lusting after a guy.

The real choice among these girls in my opinion would be between Girl 2

and Girl 8

Which one is better marriage material? You'd have to get to know each one to make that determination.

More importantly, which one are you strong enough to pull?

Good luck, gentlemen.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Alte on male chastity


For the Christian man, there are no easy answers on this issue. Ultimately, I think the sacramental grace of marriage is the most effective remedy.

This is the comment I left at Alte's:


I agree that delayed marriage is a huge factor. The sad truth of the human condition is, there’s almost no way most men can faithfully live out this teaching. Even a man who believes this, if he is healthy, is going to usually wake up every morning with a throbbing boner. Spiritually, that’s a tough way to start every day.

If a man tries to live out the Church’s teaching, especially during The Long Drought of the years when he is a young man and not yet considered marriage material, he’s going to suffer and fail, repeatedly.

The biggest answers to this problem are the sacraments: frequent confessions, Communion, and as soon as Providence provides, marriage.

But an additional answer is that men, especially young men, need to prepare themselves for marriage as early as possible. For some, that means they’ll be ready when they hit college or the workforce. Others have some growing to do, maybe some demons to conquer, or some tasks or achievements God wants him to achieve. And finally some will have to wander in the desert for awhile until the fullness of God’s time has been revealed.

The tough thing for a Christian man, in my view, is how to remain chaste while building attraction in a woman. If a man wants to be attractive to a woman, he’s gotta have some swagger. All the well-meaning advice to men from those supporting the Chuch’s teaching just seems like so much rubbish.

Welcome, Racer X

I've added you to the blogroll. Good stuff.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Grace Builds Upon Nature

During my time off, I’ve been thinking much about this blog, and where I want to take it. And what I decided is that I want to examine the relationship between nature and grace.

By nature, I mean evo-pysch/Game and by grace I mean the sacrament of marriage. How does a man emerge from the first into the second?

So, from here on out, I’m going to be trying to fit things into those two broad categories and using those two terms as shorthand. If I’m talking about nature, I’m talking about how we as fallen humans and sexual beings act in the SMP. I’ll try to offer constructive advice to Christian men so that their time in nature prepares them for the possibility of that grace.

I suppose that may sound grandiose, and that God doesn’t need my help to confer grace.

Very true.

Nonetheless, I’ll write this as my imperfect offering in the hopes that the young men coming up after me have an easier go of it. A.M.D.G.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Great Alphas and Betas on film - An Education

I finally got around to seeing An Education, starring Peter Sarsgaard and Carey Mulligan.

I enjoyed the movie. Spoilers ahead. Check out IMDB or Netflix for a description of this film.

The most fascinating thing to me about this film was one of the supporting characters, Graham. Graham is a classmate of Jenny's and has a huge crush on her. He's a sweet kid, and smart (Jenny defends him to her father saying that he might be a great writer someday) and they're in the student symphony together. Nonetheless, Jenny is not attracted to him. At all.

Although Graham and Jenny are chronological peers, 16 year olds (she a 16 year old played by a 22 year old actress), they aren't peers in the SMP. Jenny grows to dread his attentions. The most darkly hilarious moment of the film is when she indifferently bids him farewell at her birthday celebration. She doesn't even look up at the guy!

The poor bastard never knew what hit him. He was never in contention, and what's more, he never knew he wasn't in contention.

The end of the film seems to me a bit ambiguous. I don't think it's the happy ending most people think it is. Yes, she makes it to Oxford, and yes, she says she's able to pass as an innocent, but she is clearly dissatisfied with the men at Oxford, whom she calls boys. They're not boys. They're men. They might not be as mature as she would like, they might not be as suave or confident or charming, they may not have finished growing or filling out, and they might not have everything figured out, but they are men. And she remains unsatisfied and unattracted to them.

The ending made me wonder what happened to her. Did she find love? Was it with a peer or an older man? If Graham and Jenny remained single and crossed paths again 10 or 15 years down the line, I doubt he would still be enchanted with her. That would be an education too.

In praise of beautiful women

Both Grerp and Old Philly at Solomon's place had wise things to say recently, as does Alte.

Guys, these girls still exist out there. It's up to you to find them. They're dying for you to find them. God be with you.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Blue Valentine and Roissy's Maxims


Commenter Surfed over at CR has compiled a list of Roissy's maxims. Good stuff. And hilarious. And I can't wait to see the movie Blue Valentine.

The Maxims:

Maxim #1a: Women desire men of better quality than themselves.

Maxim #2: Women are turned on by displays of male power.

Maxim #3: Whenever an attractive girl tells you she hates assholes, or describes her experience in the past dating assholes and claims to avoid them now, or recites a laundry list of asshole-y things guys do that she disapproves of, you can bet your weight in gold bricks that she wants you to be an asshole to her.

Maxim #4: Never trust a woman who is missing a sense of humor.

Maxim #6: Never. Make. It. Easy. For. A. Woman.

Maxim #7: Your girl will thank you for your steadfast devotion to your belief in yourself.

Maxim #8: Always assume she is a slut. It helps kick the legs out from under the pedestal you will be tempted to put her on, and it is more often than not true.

Maxim #9: The greater the age difference between the older man and the younger woman, the tighter his game will need to be, barring compensatory attributes (money).

Maxim #10: Marriage is a social mechanism designed to exchange sex for indentured servitude.

Maxim #11: Calling a girl out on her lie accomplishes nothing.

Maxim #12: When the love is gone, women can be as cold as if they had never known you.

Maxim #13: When in doubt, game.

Maxim #14: Female cultural equality = male dating inequality. Female cultural inequality = male dating equality. Human nature says that you can‘t have it both ways.

Maxim #15: Be narcissistic. There is no greater divergence than that between a woman’s stated disapproval of male narcissism and the rapidity with which she jumps into bed with a male narcissist.

Maxim #16: The two fundamental propositions are male choosiness and female abundance. All alpha males have these two mindsets in common. Corollary: Male choosiness and female abundance do not necessarily have to be true for the strategy of behaving as if they are true to be effective at seduction.

Maxim #17: The alpha male thinks and acts more like a woman than a man in matters of seduction. He understands his adversary’s psychology, and uses it to allay her defenses.

Maxim #18: Never talk about getting into a relationship even if she says that’s what she’s looking for.

Maxim #19: Withholding sex is the tactic of a woman who has already lost. It is mutually assured destruction.

Maxim #20: If a woman says the word “sex” in conversation with you or about you, no matter the context, it means she’s thinking about having sex with you.

Maxim #21: Women are more pliable in the company of competing women.

Maxim #22: You have to make marriage an attractive alternative for MEN — not women — if you want the institution to thrive.

Maxim #23: The vagina tingle is the principal moral code to which women subscribe. All other moral considerations are secondary.

Maxim #24: When in doubt, ask yourself “WWJD?” What Would a Jerk Do? Then do that.

Maxim #25: NO girl wants to be thought she isn’t a special little snowflake.

Maxim #26: Never tell a girl how much you make, even if you’re loaded. In case of marriage, keep separate accounts.

Maxim #27: If you want a wife, stay clear of investing much in girls who constantly remind you they like to have “fun, fun, fun” and “get bored easily”.

Maxim #28: The more experience you have with women, the more you’ll know which women have experience with men: It is the inexperienced beta male who is most often in the dark about a woman’s sexual history and liable to be victimized by it.

Maxim #29: Xenophobia is good for diversity.

Maxim #30: Women will not hold it against you for trying to get into their panties on the first night. In fact, they will respect you more for your boldness and willingness to follow your manly desires.

Maxim #31: If you plan on cheating and subsequently get caught, act like a total dick who did nothing wrong. Your girlfriend will then wonder if it’s something she did.

Maxim #32: Commanding women to do your bidding will give you a bigger beta margin of error when needed.

Maxim #33: Women need to test men for their grace under pressure.

Maxim #34: If she’s hot, why would she bother with online dating?

Maxim #35: Never trust a woman’s advice on how to please women. Her advice is designed for alpha men she already finds attractive and from whom she seeks signals of attainability and commitment.

Maxim #36: A woman’s sex and relationship advice isn’t meant to help men; it’s meant to distract men from what really works to attract women.

Maxim #37: High IQ is no inoculation against beta delusion. If anything, high IQ obstructs clear thinking about women’s nature.

Maxim #38: The longer you are away from seducing new women, the harder it will be to seduce one when you want.

Maxim #39: The worst thing to happen to women in America was women’s suffrage.

Maxim #40: Men are becoming ever bigger betas in their dealings with women. Men are losing the leverage to shape and push women’s child-like and selfishly amoral political opinions in logical, just and long-term oriented directions.

Maxim #41: The definition of Inner Game: Hit on every woman who excites you. Make life uncomfortable for them, not yourself.

Maxim # 42: When a girl signals that she doesn’t enjoy blowjobs or sex, do not spend one second more with her. Your libido is too important to gamble on such a girl.

Maxim #43: In their sexual primes women’s attraction for assholes is at its strongest. You can catch a lot of hungry flies with honey, but shit attracts the most well-fed flies.

Maxim #44: If you get sexually rejected, don’t admit it to yourself, and especially don’t admit it to the girl.

Maxim #45: Women will screech louder the closer your words get to damaging or exposing vulnerabilities in their sexual market value.

Maxim #46: Whenever you hear or read the words “gender”, “gendered”, “gendered norm”, “subtle gender bias”, or “increasingly egalitarian, yet there remains…” know that you are dealing with a leftwing moonbat, blank-slate believing fruitcake who cannot deal with the fact that men and women are biologically different from birth.

Maxim #47: Awareness of a woman’s games is a precision-guided weapon in a man’s arsenal of seduction.

Maxim #48: Respect the momentum.

Maxim #49: The rare older woman-younger man pairing is like a lab experiment gone wrong. It violates the natural order of things, and leaves its practitioners emotionally twisted and in a constant mental race to hyper-rationalize their sub-par mate choice.

Maxim #50: Marriage is no escape from the sexual market and the possibility that you may be outbid by a competitor with higher value.

Maxim #51: For most women, five minutes of alpha is worth five years of beta.

Maxim #52: Underneath the veneer of civilized discourse we act in ways that are brazenly self-interested in the short term.

Maxim #53: All kneel before the god of biomechanics, by sword or by surrender.

Maxim #54: When a woman has incentive to lie, she will choose lying over honesty EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Maxim #55: Run for your Life Shit Tests:
BEWARE the classic gun-to-the-head marriage pressure administered by your typical non-descript, rudderless late 20’s/early 30’s woman.
When a woman pressures you mercilessly to marry her, bullying to the point of threatening a break up – this is the shit test of ALL shit tests. Treat it as such – If you fail this shit test, you are RUINED. FOR. LIFE.

Maxim #60: Waving a roll of benjamins at a woman will not give her tingles. In fact, it will often do the opposite.

Maxim #73: When a girl emphatically insists she is so over you, she’s never been more into you.

Maxim #21: Betas pay, alphas split, super alphas profit.

Maxim #39: A woman’s standards are like a house of cards: kick out one from the bottom and the whole edifice crashes down.

Maxim #85: As women’s bodies age and weaken, their rationalization hamsters grow bigger and stronger. Eventually, the hamster is powerful enough to take control of all higher order consciousness.

Maxim #87: The more expensive or thoughtful the gift you give a girl, the greater the risk that she will subconsciously begin to think she is too good for you.

Corollary to Maxim #87: If you are dating out of your league, or you are dating a young hot babe in her prime, you should do the exact opposite of what everyone will tell you to do — *don’t* buy her expensive gifts. Be particularly wary of advice from women. No woman in the world is capable of thinking clearly or impartially on the matter of “acceptable” levels of male provisioning. Even old, fat hausfrau hogs will expect mountains of jewels in offerings from men.

Maxim #105: Where there’s incentive, there are lies.

Maxim #109: Consensual polyamory is a contrived hookup service for undesirable sexual market rejects.

Maxim #198: Use of the word “disenfranchised” or other similar nomenclature of deconstructivist post-modern pablum automatically discredits an argument for serious consideration.

Maxim #200: Chicks dig guys willing to risk an early, gruesome death. Expendability is a DHV.